Vegas Happenings
What happens in Las Vegas stays in Las Vegas. That’s the city’s motto. Nevertheless, I think they could abridge the motto to “Your money happens to stay in Las Vegas.”
I am going to take the time to describe something located a few hours away from Las Vegas, one of the most beautiful things in the world, as a passive way of discouraging you from visiting Sin City.
Did you know the Grand Canyon is only like 3.5 hours away from Las Vegas? It’s one of the wonders of the world. I strongly encourage you to take whatever money you were going to spend in Vegas and go to the South Rim of the Grand Canyon and throw it as far as you can. Watch its majestic trajectory. Throwing pennies in to the Colorado River is probably good luck. Maybe now you can throw down a cool hundred dollars at the tables in Vegas with better fortune, a sense of purpose, and a much clearer conscience. After all, you witnessed at the Grand Canyon that there is, in fact, a God with decent taste in design. The National Parks Service thanks you kindly for your donation, and requests that you please not litter in the future.
None of the casinos have clocks or exit signs. The slot machines are positioned to make the floors like mazes. What happens in Las Vegas stays in Las Vegas. They want as much of you to stay in Las Vegas as possible.
We escape the strip and find ourselves at a gas station, filling up for the road to Los Angeles. I buy some orange juice and cereal inside, the healthiest thing I’ve done in days. The total is $2.98. I toss 2 pennies in the “have a penny? leave a penny. need a penny? take a penny” jar. I wish I hadn’t.
While pulling out of the gas station, we realize there are no signs to exit the city either. It seems the civil engineers work in cahoots with the casino owners. I run back inside the gas station and ask for directions. “Take 3 right turns and you’re there”. I trust the cashier’s advice as much as the roulette pit boss’.
